Jim Florentine's 'Comedy Metal Midgets'

This Never Happened

with Jim Florentine. These things never happened, a collection of stories from the internet.

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The Good Side of Bad News

with Jim Florentine. A lot of made up stories at the grocery story, and child who can see no...

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Random Rants

with Jim Florentine. “It’s okay to do nice things for people. You don't have to make it up and...

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Awful Dating Sites

with Jim Florentine. \"Y\'know when a girl writes in her profile that she’s not a sleazy bitch,...

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Awful Inspirational Quotes

with Jim Florentine. \"Teamwork makes the dream work.\" No it doesn\'t.

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Awful T Shirts

with Jim Florentine. \"You’re supposed to eat pizza, not want to fuck it.”

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Awful Yelp Reviews

with Jim Florentine. “She’s bitching about the food at Chuck E Cheese. That’s like going to a...

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Awful Slang Words

with Jim Florentine. \"Ban this stuff. This is hate speech. This is what I consider hate speech”

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Good Side of Bad News

with Jim Florentine. \"If you’re going to fuck your dog, at least treat the dog to a hotel.”

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Facebook Posts

I watched Dirty Dancing, finally. Here\'s my review.

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Things That Never Happened

with Jim Florentine. \"The smiley face is the fucking laugh track of the internet. I don\'t need...

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Awful Facebook Games

with Jim Florentine. \"Why would anyone lie about this game? And why would anyone give a shit if...

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Awful Dating Sites

with Jim Florentine. \"I\'m your classic girl next door”

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Awful Vanity Plates

with Jim Florentine. \"A real macho man would be driving a pickup truck or a Harley instead of a...

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Awful Inspirational Quotes

with "Jim Florentine" “How is THIS an inspirational quote?”

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Inspirational Quotes

with Jim Florentine. "Monday Blues," or maybe your life just sucks.

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Random Rants

with Jim Florentine. "I've been to the Cowboys stadium. It's like a strip club during the...

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Good Side Of Bad News

with Jim Florentine. “If I pulled a gun on everyone that told me I had a small penis, I'd be...

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Yelp! Reviews, March 4, 2021

More Awful Yelp Reviews with Jim Florentine.

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Awful Yelp Reviews - March 1, 2021

Don't "mellow out" Jim Florentine. Honestly, this is the worst meal you've ever had? Really?...

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