Andy Martin's posts

Sight for sore eyes

I'm learning Braille, but I don't want to talk about it. It's a touchy subject. What’s so funny...

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Stretching exercise

Dyslexic prisoners are not helped by long sentences. What’s so funny about this? I had to pause...

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Getting lofty

Why are mountains so funny? – Because they’re hill-areas. What’s so funny about this? We all...

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Wait for it

Doesn't expecting the unexpected mean that the unexpected is actually expected? What’s so funny...

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Bug out

A bunch of germs go into a bar. The bartender tells them to get out because they don’t serve...

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I ain?™t got nobody

What do you call a failed full body sculpture? A bust. What’s so funny about this? I’m not a...

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Put in a good word

I changed my password to "incorrect" so whenever I forget it the computer will say, "Your...

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Say it ain?™t so

Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles and other items to be recycled. Proceeds will be used to...

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Second thoughts

Do hungry time-travelers ever go back four seconds? What’s so funny about this? This joke is an...

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All wet

Today a man knocked on my door and asked for a small donation towards the local swimming pool, so...

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Pain mangement

You can easily touch me, but not see me. You can throw me out, but not away. What am I? #joke...

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Low selfie steam

I can never take my own picture with my cell phone because it starts to vaporize, and then...

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Suck it up

I bought a vacuum cleaner six months ago and so far all it's been doing is gathering dust....

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A bridge too far

What did the man say as he was hanging from the bridge? – “The suspension is killing me”....

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Kinda cheesy

I’m trying to think of the reasons I want to move to Switzerland; I know the flag is a big plus....

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Everything's in order

I'm having a great day: I woke up early, got out of bed, went to the bathroom. In that order....

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Circular argument

The invention of the wheel created a revolution. What’s so funny about this? The title of this...

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Weep no more

Seating at sad stage shows is usually teared. What’s so funny about this? One of my favorite old...

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The march of time

Why did the hourglass only take a half an hour to empty? – Because it was filled with quicksand....

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Something?™s fishy

Successful corrective surgery on mermaids depends on the detailing. What’s so funny about this?...

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